It happened, didn’t it? You finally fell for that pretty girl and now you’re flummoxed as to how you should proceed with asking her out. You don’t need to do something big or flashy to sweep her off her feet. In fact, you can do it as easily as over text and still have her swooning over you if you play your cards right.

  1. Sound Confident

Confidence is the key to asking a girl out over text. If you aren’t confident, there is a good chance that you may have to face rejection.

  • Even if you are feeling underconfident, don’t let it show.
  • Since you’re talking over text, you can easily pretend to be confident.
  • Choose your words wisely and don’t fumble.
  • Don’t send the text too casually during the day and don’t sound cocky or overconfident either.
  • If you appear nervous over text, she may end up feeling that you are unsure of yourself and may end up saying no to your advances.
  1. Don’t Just Say it Abruptly

There needs to be some form of a special moment between you two when you ask her out on a date. Don’t just drop her a text asking her out when she is at school or at work.

  • Initiate a conversation and make sure she is online before sending her a text asking her out.
  • Make sure she is being receptive when you start a conversation along the lines of dating.
  • Don’t send a text asking her out in the middle of another conversation.
  1. Build Some Anticipation

Since you don’t have the luxury of showing expressions or asking her out face to face, you need to build some anticipation before you finally pop the question.

  • Steer the conversation in such a way that she ends up expecting you to ask her out.
  • The waiting is what will excite her, so don’t rush through it just to get it off your chest.
  • Don’t wait for too long before popping the question as her interest in you may waver. Drop a few hints for her to pick up before you finally ask her out.
  1. Frame Your Sentences Well

Since you don’t have the usual conveniences of a normal conversation, make sure you choose your words wisely. You will not be able to take back anything you said so be sure of what you are texting.

  • Avoid use abbreviations and texting short forms.
  • Avoid using lingo just to sound cool.
  • Use good grammar and vocabulary while texting her.
  • Don’t add too many filler words in your sentences.
  1. Don’t Indulge in Meaningless Banter

When boys are unsure whether it’s the right time to ask the question, they end up engaging in endless banter. This banter is meaningless and may end up boring girls and killing their interest in you.

  • Initiate conversations on topics you both find interesting.
  • If you feel that she is getting bored, change the topic.
  • Keep her interested in texting you.
  • Don’t try to get her to talk about a topic which only you like.
  • Make sure that your sentences are framed in a clear and concise way.
  1. Don’t Send Generic Texts

The way you text is an extension of your personality. This is important since girls will be judging what kind of a person you are, from your texts.

  • Don’t send her cheesy pick uplines and don’t Google for texts to send her.
  • Don’t rely on forwarded jokes to get her attention.
  • Don’t try to impress her by saying or doing things you usually wouldn’t.
  1. Be Yourself

This is one of the most important factors when it comes to texting girls. Make sure you are being yourself over text and not pretending to be someone else when you’re asking her out over text.

  • Girls may end up expecting you to be a particular kind of person which you may not be if you text them just to impress them.
  • Don’t try too hard to sound cool as it may end up making you look desperate.
  • Just be yourself and don’t try to conform to what girls look for a man.
  • Act in line with your personality; don’t try to be someone you are not.
  1. Don’t Incessantly Text Her

If you have made up your mind about asking her out over text, you may be eager to get it over with as quickly as possible. However, girls take their own sweet time and may not reply to your messages immediately.

  • If she isn’t replying to your messages immediately, it doesn’t necessarily mean that she is ignoring you.
  • Don’t keep sending multiple texts if she isn’t replying.
  • Don’t push the question, if she isn’t replying quickly means she may be busy with something else and in such a situation you should put off asking her out for the time being.
  • If you keep texting her multiple times, it may end up making you look needy.
  • It shouldn’t look like you are dying to talk to her.
  1. Make Her Guess

This is an effective method of building up an aura of suspense and interest around your proposal. While asking her out, leave it unclear whether it’s a date or just a casual hangout session.

  • Girls love suspense, so if you don’t make it obvious that it’s a date you will end up getting her more interested in you.
  • Let her stay awake wondering if it’s a date or a hangout session, this will only help your chances with her later.
  • The suspense and anticipation will work in your favor.
  • Don’t make the whole process of you asking her out sound too casual.
  1. Mention a Date and Time

While asking girls out over text make sure you don’t leave any ambiguity. Ask her out for a date on a particular day and at a particular time.

  • Simply asking if she wants to go out on a date without putting forward any date and time makes it sound too casual and increases the chances of you getting turned down.
  • You can ask her if she is free on a particular day and time and if she says yes, then you can proceed with asking her out.
  • Mentioning a date and time ensures that she will look forward to it.
  • Without a date and time, your plans just hang in limbo and may never materialize despite her saying yes.
  • Laying out clear and concise plans will increase your chances of getting a positive response.
  1. Make Plans Before Asking Her Out

Girls like it when boys put in effort into planning a date. Since you are asking her out over text, make sure you have something planned before you do.

  • Explore restaurants and cafes with the right décor for a date and consider getting a reservation if the place you are picking is popular.
  • Try to plan something different from a classic date at a restaurant.
  • If you know what she likes to do, then try to plan your date based on her preferences.
  • Make sure you plan a date where both of you can have fun and enjoy each other’s company.
  1. Keep the Conversation Light

Girls too, feel pressurized to send an appropriate reply to a text asking for a date. So, when you finally text her asking her out for a date, make sure she doesn’t feel pressurized. Make sure she is at ease when you ask her the question.

  • Frame the text asking her out in a crisp yet friendly way so that she feels at ease while replying to it. Use your personal humor and not internet jokes to erode the depth of the situation.
  • Make her feel comfortable with you before asking her out on a date over text since this will make her want your company.
  • Keeping the conversation light will ensure that she looks forward to hanging out with you.
  1. Don’t Appear Needy or Desperate

Most boys end up appearing desperate and needy in front of girls since they really want things to work out well for them. While hoping and trying are not crimes, make sure you don’t overdo your advances.

  • Don’t text her all the time.
  • Don’t keep trying to get her attention.
  1. Express Your Feelings for Her

Most boys try to look cool by not showing emotions. They think emotions are unmanly and they need to appear tough to impress girls. This couldn’t be farther from the truth.

  • Tell her how much she means to you.
  • Express how you feel about her and tell her how much you’d like to be with her.
  • Try to do away with hiding emotions altogether.
  1. Refer to the Times You have Spent Together

Conversations over text are harder to maintain unless you have spent time together which you can refer to.

  • Talk about some of the deep conversations which you may have had.
  • Talk about the time when you both hung out and had a lot of fun.
  • Talk about any funny memories you have together.
  • Ask her how she feels about spending more time with you.
  1. Focus on Her

The girl you are asking out should be your center of attention when you are texting her.

  • Focus on how she is responding to your texts.
  • Focus on which topics she is finding enjoyable.
  • Gauge her reactions.
  1. Be Genuine

Girls generally prefer boys who are genuine over boys who try hard to impress them. While asking a girl out over text, make sure you express your genuine desire to go out on a date with her as this will increase the chances of her saying yes.

  • Express your feelings genuinely so that she knows you’re serious about asking her out on a date.
  • She will end up expecting you to be someone who you really are if you are genuine with her.
  • She will trust you more if you are genuine.
  • Being genuine will help you score additional brownie points since girls are used to boys bending over backward to impress them.
  • This will increase your chances of getting a positive response from the girl you like when you ask her out on a date over text.


  • Express yourself freely and genuinely so that she feels comfortable doing the same around you.
  • Be calm, composed and confident. If you are calm and composed, she will feel that you know what you’re doing and that you really want to go out on a date with her.

Keep your emotions in check. She may end up saying no for a date because she is genuinely busy. In such a case wait for her to suggestive alternative plans or wait for a week before asking her out again.