Break up are among the widely discussed subjects all over social media. However, it doesn’t take long before some of the audience falling victim to breakups. Even though breakups are not uncommon in contemporary society, its occurrence may cause tones of nasty things.
And in most cases, it may leave one party frustrated, destabilized, and even leading to irrational decisions that may be life-costly. Now, how can you get over a breakup and remain sound? Well, below are some of the proven tips that help tones of people to cope up with breakups and continue living a healthy and productive life.
Get Over a Breakup with Someone you Love (15 Tips)
- Accept the Breakup
Accepting the situation is one of the immediate antidotes that works pretty well. If you want to relieve your mind of endless bells and a series of unanswered questions, accepting the situation is the key. Doing that gives your brain an ample room to begin loading your next recovery mission in response to the same.
It can go without saying that most of the mental issues experienced by breakup victims are attributed to the fact that they never want to let it go. And if such feelings are not tamed, they become mind-blowing to the extent that it is hard to heal. To be precise, learn to let it go when you cannot avoid it and reclaim your peace of mind.
- Share it with People you Trust
As the saying goes that a problem shared is a problem half-solved, it’s, however, another great way of getting over a breakup. When you explain your situation to trusted friends, you will feel a sense of relief, even without them coming directly to your help. In other words, it eases the burden of thoughts that would have otherwise eaten you up inadvertently.
When people who love you genuinely know what you’re indeed hurting, they’ll always reach out to you in diverse ways. Some may offer you frequent invites to share fun-filled activities that may be great for relieving stress.
Such activities include but not limited to yoga classes, movie nights, hikes, and home-made delicacies. These make you feel that you have everyone you need to live a positive life.
- Reclaim your Self-Worth
Most of the sudden breakups are always brain-jamming and may make one feel worthless. Yes, it does, especially when one isn’t aware of the leading cause of the misfortune. And in most cases, the victim’s mind may blow out when trying to figure out why he or she is getting ripped off the relationship.
At times, you may start figuring out that you might have had no value to offer to the relationship. Such feelings may culminate in low self-esteem, considering what other people may have to say about you.
Come on! It doesn’t warrant all that. All you should do is to focus much on the value you added to the relationship while it lasted. And by that, you’ll realize your strength and feel proud of some of your past achievements. As such, you’ll maintain high self-worth.
- Do Away with Peace-Robbing Memory Triggers
If you want to be peaceful, and stop regret thoughts, get off all the things that keep reminding you of your Ex. Such items include but not limited to watch, jewelry, smell or perfume, music, place, clothes, and much more.
If you aren’t ready to part with such things, moving on may not be easy as you’ll always keep the memory alive as long as you see anything that links back to your ex. Parting with the memory triggers doesn’t mean disposing of the things, or burning some.
However, it merely means that you keep the items safely where you won’t be seeing them in almost every second. At least that would be better for your recovery.
- Keep Distance
At times, you might decide to remain friends after breakups. And that sounds somewhat kind to each other. However, much that might seem right; it might turn a trap that may slip you back into breakup stress or a possible renewed relationship.
In other words, keeping distance means not seeing each other, no moving around with your ex-family members or relative, no phone calls, and no messaging to each other. In addition to that, you should also keep off his/her social media chats, updates, and profile.
Only make communications when you cannot avoid it. However, this shouldn’t mean that you should treat him/her as a lifetime enemy, but keeping off your ex, by all means, is pretty good for as long as you’re still recovering.
In case your ex calls you to see him or her, never make a mistake of going to see the person. Unless under critical circumstances that require you to be there.
- Carry out a Social Media Detox
Recovering from a breakup when you’re still friends with your ex in social media might be a pipe dream. However, unfollowing them may not be enough to cut off the links.
Even if you unfollow or withdraw your ex’s contacts from your social media account, ensure to block the person.
This keeps you off from seeing your ex’s updates and following on their life events. Also, blocking your ex on social media limits the chances for internet-stalk.
If you find it challenging to resist snooping into your ex’s posts and profile, you can stop using social media for a while until you recover fully from the breakup.
- Take Time to Nurse the Heartbreak Wounds
At times, you may face a painful breakup that leaves a considerable dent in your heart that needs a long time to recover.
In some people, the impact of the negative emotions may last for weeks or a few months, while others can take a couple of years to recover.
If there is anything you can do to improve quickly from the grief, please do it. Whether it’s yelling, screaming, or crying, do anything harmless that can help you off-set the negative mood and then move on. As you nurse your wounds, ensure you eat high-quality food and a well-balanced diet to stay healthy.
- Engage in Healthy Behaviors that can Sooth your Breakup Pain
Apart from keeping off your ex, among other activities, you should also engage in some worthwhile activities that drive away loneliness and sudden stress.
At this desperate time, taking alcohol and drugs to soothe your emotional pain may just postpone your plight if not throwing you into another crisis.
Instead, you can join boxing and be going for classes or enter any other club that can keep you actively involved. Also, you can take up new hobbies that can keep you distracted and drain your brain energy.
If there’s any place you’ve ever wanted to go before, this is the time to do so. Going out to your cherished destination may make a difference in your emotions as you’ll be overwhelmed with happiness and joy that comes with exotic scenes and lifestyles.
Besides that, going out will change your perspective about things life.
- Avoid a rebound
A rebound simply means making a quick fix to redeem your self-worth by jumping into another relationship. This might seem an ideal way of dealing with breakup pains when it’s not. And the benefits might last only for a while.
The uninformed rebound may lead to another possible breakup and remorse that might be bitter than your first heartbreak.
Therefore, instead of jumping into another relationship, head first as an escape route from being hurt, be responsible enough to deal with the pain of your initial breakup first.
And then decide whether to get into another relationship after you recover fully. One of the ways to avoid a rebound is by stepping out and doing things on your own. You can book a mini-vacation for yourself, go shopping, go on go hiking, and much more.
- Make a Breakup Playlist
Music is one of the sure tools for mood correction. And that’s why having a breakup mix might be one of the necessities that you need to regain “yourself.”
When you find yourself in a churning pool of bitter emotions while carrying on with your regular chores, look no further than a breakup mix. This will soothe your post-breakup pain and relax your mind.
- Get a Therapist to get you through
Some breakups always leave deep emotional wounds that some people may find difficult to cope up with. If you find yourself in such life-threatening emotion, it would be great to seek the services of a therapist to help you get back to normalcy.
With their specialization in helping people to deal with emotional disturbance, a therapist will help you to set goals and positively train your mind. In addition to that, a therapist will help you to streamline your life towards a positive future.
- Know that it Takes Time to Move On
Erasing the good memories that you’ve had together for years may not be possible overnight. But it takes a gradual day-by-day improvement as you try to refocus your thoughts on a big future for yourself.
As you continue interacting with people, you’ll always keep improving your self-esteem and do away with the traumatizing memory.
Also, you’re likely to encounter other kinds, caring, and humane people who’re ready to help you move on positively.
And as time progresses, you will recover completely and have a new definition of life. However, the time taken to heal is relative, and each breakup victim may have a different healing period.
- Embark on Self-Care
Most of the painful breakups come with mood disorder accompanied by severe stress that can easily cause harm when you do not dive into caring for yourself.
Possibly, you may develop uncommon behavior right from how you take meals, sleep, and socialize. And also lose the taste of everything and begin erratic feeding habits.
That could occur due to the high levels of cortisol hormone that causes severe stress. But that shouldn’t be the case, as you can suffer more harm and even end up with digestion problems, insomnia, headaches, and more.
Now, all you should do is to maintain a double health standard by scheduling for exercise, taking healthy meals, try out new things, and have a decent sleep.
Healthy diets consisting of green veggies, fruits, seeds, fish, lean meat, and yogurt goes a long way into a quick recovery. Also, ensure you take foods rich in antioxidants, probiotics, and omega 3 for improved mood and reduced anxiety.
- Do Things that Make you Feel Valuable
A break may leave you feeling a misfit in society. This comes when you can no longer feel comfortable to socialize with those who knew you were part of each other. You may feel even feel unwilling to volunteer in the church as you used to when you were together.
Come on! Parting ways doesn’t mean you stop every healthy activity you used to do together. Even though you have to stop engaging in some businesses, you should continue being active in events that anchor your core values. And above all, keep doing what motivates you and makes you feel worth.
- Don’t Rush into Another Hookup
As much as it’s more than hurting to face an unexpected breakup, it should always be the time to learn more in life. You should turn to yourself and find out the weakness that you should work on to avoid facing the same. Also, it should be enough lesson that things aren’t always what they look like. After that, take time to add value to yourself as you heal.
However much you may get tempted to jump into another relationship, resist the temptation. Of course, you can get into another relationship later after you fully recover.
But be careful before getting into another relationship to avoid landing into another gut-wrenching relationship that may cause a double breakup pain should it collapse.
Get Over a Relationship Fast for Guys (9 Tips)
Many people tend to believe that only ladies do feel the heat of breakups. But that’s far from the truth. Breakups are always gut-wrenching for both parties involved. And men aren’t an exception. Below are the tips to help you move on quickly.
- Accept the Breakup Pain
Allow yourself to grieve for a while to get rid of the dangerous emotions. Never hold back the emotions. Avoid the myths that men shouldn’t grieve, and if they do, they’re perceived weak, or the perception that men don’t cry. Instead, allow yourself to grieve.
According to Washington-based Alicia H. Clark, PsyD, “There is no better way through this process [of grieving] than to feel your feelings” You can cry, scream, shout, or even break something if need be.
This would be pretty much good for you rather than bottling up the emotions that would later cause you harm. Also, reflect on the possible weaknesses on your side that would lead to a break-up and try to work on them.
- Don’t be a Victim to Regrets
Now that she’s gone, it’s not time to speculate over what you could have done better. But it’s fine to reflect on your mistakes objectively without ending up into self-criticism. Also, avoid judging your ex. Instead, acknowledge the reality of nature that not all relationships will always work out.
And if any relationship fails, the two parties are both to bear the blame, not only you. And lastly, have it in mind that breakup is typical and may occur due to sheer incompatibility. And of course, it’s a better opportunity to move on and meet your perfect match.
- Avoid Internet-Stalking and Social Media Surveillance
After a breakup, it’s advisable to block your ex in all the social media platforms that you used in common. Block her and her relatives to move on quickly.
If you haven’t done that, you might find yourself tempted to stalk her or keep tracking her moves over the social medial.
According to a study conducted, social media surveillance on ex-partners leads to “greater current distress over the breakup, more negative feelings, sexual desire, and longing for the ex-partner, and lower personal growth.”
Therefore, if you feel you can’t avoid stalking her online, take a break from social media to recover from the breakup pain before getting to social media. At least you won’t be able to see her social media activities and also stop thinking about her.
- Cut Off All Communications With Your Ex
After a breakup, you might decide to remain friends. But that won’t work well for you when you need time to recover. According to Jill P. Weber, Ph.D., an expert on psychology, “continuing to communicate with your ex will only prolong suffering”.
Therefore, don’t rush to the decision of remaining friends if at all you want to move on fast. Stay off as much as you can until you’ve fully recovered.
At least that would be great for your fast recovery. But this might work well when you don’t have to see your ex daily.
Under some exceptional circumstances, avoiding your ex might be daunting, and a dream far-fetched. Such situations include:
- When you have children to take care of together: In this situation, avoiding your ex might seem somehow impossible due to the co-parenting responsibilities. You will have to schedule on when to visit your children and organize for some events together.
Even though you will no longer be in a relationship, ensure the negative impact of breakups doesn’t creep into the welfare of your children. Also, avoid talking ill of their mum in their presence.
- When your ex is a co-worker: If this is the case, you need not panic. All you should do is to embrace professionalism in all your interactions. Uphold the good work relationship as if nothing happened before.
Be polite to her in your verbal communication and avoid gossips that might hurt your dignity and reputation. And if that doesn’t go well with you, you can consider taking a transfer where possible.
When you cannot avoid seeing or meeting your ex, always do things that make you gain confidence while with them.
Dress decently and attractively show that you’ve moved on and ready to meet other significant people out there. But always prepare in advance before meeting your ex.
- Avoid Jumping into a Rebound Head-Fast
Most of the guys who find themselves victims of relationships always try to cheat themselves of being hardy and smart and smart to grieve.
And as a result, they quickly jump into another relationship head-fast to cover up the pain and some shame.
Others end up going for nightstands and having a sexual relationship with multiple women. Unfortunately, this kind of misconduct doesn’t provide a lasting solution to your heartbreak pain. According to Dan Bacon, a dating expert, you should have time to recover before getting into another relationship.
- Seek Friends and Family Support
Regardless of how private you might want your breakup to be, you still need people to help you find your way out.
According to Carrie Bradshaw in his heroine of “Sex and the City,” he puts it clear that, “No matter who broke your heart or how long it takes to heal, you’ll never go through it without your friends”. And that’s it.
Even if you have the feeling of taking it on your own when heartbreak bites, locking yourself out of friends and relatives doesn’t make the situation any better. And isolation will only worsen the state of your grief.
Therefore, get to talk to some people you trust about the issue. As the saying goes, “A problem shared is a problem half solved.”
Of course, you shouldn’t go telling everyone about it as that may only attract you additional shame and irrational judgment.
When done with the bad feelings, keep planning, and engaging with friends in many activities to keep you distracted. By doing that, you will get over a breakup faster than you expected.
- Be Patient to Heal and Get Ready Before Getting into a new Relationship
After a breakup, it’s advisable to take enough breaks to improve entirely and learn from the situation before you can move on and date other people. However, the time taken to recover depends on individual factors.
According to A psychology expert Paulette Kouffman Sherman, Psy.D statement to Glamour, “most people may need a month or two to process their breakup, to mourn, and integrate lessons before jumping back in if they were in a fairly serious relationship.”
- Move to a new Home
Staying in the same house that you used to enjoy the stay in with her can be one of the outstanding memory triggers that may not be good for you. Anything you will see in the house will be alluding to her presence in the past.
Also, those who’re not aware of the breakup will keep asking for her whereabouts. Therefore, you need to breathe fresh air and get distracted by the environment of the new home.
At least no one would keep asking for her in the new neighborhood, thereby letting the memory fade.
- Focus on Personal Improvement Activities
Having been left alone, it may be peace robbing and demotivating. But it might also be the best opportunity to live for yourself.
Try to set challenging goes and work hard and smart to achieve them. That might keep you working up to late hours, thereby leaving you with no chance of contemplating the nasty past.
In addition to that, you can also reward yourself by going for the favorite things you didn’t have time to enjoy together.
Moreover, have a positive perspective about yourself and view yourself as an independent super being who can make it in her absence.
Get Over a Breakup While Pregnant (7 Tips)
Pregnancy period is one of the most unfortunate times to end up in a breakup having in mind the unique psychological condition that you’re in. However, you still have to deal with the issue and move on. Below are some proven tips that can work great to help you move o
- Take Time to Grieve
Regardless of the circumstances that might have led to the separation, the break will, in any case, hurt. Since this comes at the time you’re also in an exceptional condition, you should always have the health and life of your baby at heart.
Therefore, drifting into extreme emotions might be not only a health threat to your life but also your unborn baby. As such, you should accept the plight and take time to grieve as you plan on the ways out.
- Bury your Past and Focus on the Future
Accepting to break up and collecting the pieces of your life to move forth is one of the strategies of dealing with post-breakup stress. You can do that by clearing all the memory triggers that might link you to your ex.
If your were left to live alone in the house, you should clear all the pictures and other things that remind you of the past.
Be it valentine’s gift or any other special gift, do not shy from keeping them as far as you can to ensure that you don’t keep seeing it every day.
If your hobby means you should go away, go ahead and carry with you only things that you will need. This will at least help you to stay away from your primary source of stress. While away, shift your mind from the misfortune and focus on your future with your baby.
- Find Healthy Stress Management Strategies
Stress can have a severe effect on your health as well as that of your baby. It can cause your body pressure to escalate to the levels that are not easy to manage.
In addition to that, stress can cause drastic hormonal changes that are not favorable to your unborn kid. Moreover, stress can cause a digestion problem, among others.
For you to minimize stress, you need to engage in some light activities that are brain energy-draining and also choose stress-reducing food.
Such food includes green vegetables, fruits, lean meat, yogurt and other antioxidant-rich diets. These types of food are proven to reduce the level of cortisol hormone that causes stress.
Also, you can get yourself some of the popular books and read, and connect with family members and friends.
- Understand that Breakups During Pregnancy are Uncommon
Finding yourself separated by your partner at the time when you need him the most is heart-aching. But you should take it easy as you are not the only one to face the cruelty of breakup at such a condition. Instead, many women faced the same and still overcame the odds to become happy and successful single mothers.
And therefore, you’re not an exception. All you should do is to take courage, make plans, and remain focused. Besides that, avoid regrets and build self-value.
- Realize that you are Strong to Overcome your Situation
Getting exposed to a new life that wasn’t anywhere within your entire expectation can be hurting, and again self-awakening. It can stir-up the potential that you’d have rather not know that you possess.
Now that things are slumping on your side, you should be resilient enough to survive the low times. You should stand tall for yourself and your baby’s wellbeing.
You can try to learn new things for it’s time to change course. And at long last, you will emerge out of the whole mess victorious.
- Get Financial and Social Support
Regardless of where you are after the imminent breakup, your success in single-parenting is dictated by the resources at your disposal.
Since taking care of a newborn to adulthood is quite expensive, having adequate financial support would make you feel grounded.
Therefore, do not shy from seeking financial help from family members, friends, nearby care group, or contacting a nearby helpline.
With that, you will be able to cater to your baby’s special needs as you continue working on the ways out.
- Set your Priorities
During the post-heartbreak period, making the right choices might mean consulting your significant others for impartial assessment. Or taking your time to scrutinize the situation and options you’re presented with and make the most appropriate decision.
Since you’re needy, you might also be vulnerable to other problems that come due to inappropriate decisions and impaired judgment.
Therefore, be assertive and keen on any move that you take and ensure it doesn’t cause further hell for you and your unborn baby.
Instead, focus on things that will give your baby a decent future. And above all, ensure you bring up your child in a happy environment.