Codependency is learned from the people around.
It is actually being totally dependent on a person emotionally and psychologicallyCodependency is a strong human nature that can even pass down generationsIt even affects the person’s relationships with others and the conversation becomes unhealthyIt is really difficult to come out of it, but if the person wants, they can take their time and support from others.
Having a Conversation with the Family
It will be really easy for the person to first understand codependency and try to learn all the symptoms and characteristics of a person who is codependent. Always keep in mind that a mental health professional is the best person to treat codependency.
- It is preferred to take care of the painful emotions that drive the person. Once the negative emotions go away, the codependent person will gradually get better.
- As the person will always want to get pleased by others, they should reduce that and try to be happy with how they are and with the things around them.
Codependency doesn’t have a Cure
As everyone knows that codependency is a mental health problem, so it cannot be cured with any kind of medicine or any physical therapy. People won’t even realize that they have this problem. They will eventually get normal with the codependent behavior and it will become their nature.
- Don’t force the family members to make them understand the way codependent people think. It won’t do any good. Eventually, all the people around will have negative thinking towards the codependent person.
- All the family members need to understand that there is no other treatment except psychotherapy. The person needs to be treated mentally and not with any medicine or with any physical therapy.
Being Away from the Family
It does not mean that the person should stop talking or meeting the family members. Being away means listening to the positive and constructive words of the family members. The codependent person should also respond to only selective things that relate to their family members and to avoid the things that will increase the chances of being codependent.
- Sometimes a mother can ask for some advice. This can be a normal conversation with the family members. But if she is entering the person house and change all the clothes and accessories just because she thinks that it won’t be good for the person is a serious codependent behavior.
- The person should come out of the daily routine and calm themselves down and think of something that will give them a positive feeling. This can give the codependent person their own time to understand what it feels like to be self-dependant.
Best Thing is to Say “No”
This doesn’t mean that the person has to say no to everything. It means whenever there is a situation of codependency, the person should avoid it. This will take a lot of effort but with time it will be fine. People will come to help you out in everything but the person has to start doing their work and control their emotional behavior.
- The person should listen first and try to say no the right way to avoid the codependent situation.
- Sometimes it is important to diplomatically answer to the codependent questions. The person can clearly deny. It is never important to accept everything.
Don’t be Violent
It is not at all important to be violent while having a conversation. It is always good to have a decent conversation even if someone is trying to manipulate or harm the person with their words. The moment the person feels that the conversation is going out of control, and then they should immediately get away from the conversation.
- A peaceful conversation always has non-criticism statements and with no one blaming the person for anything.
- All this can lead to great improvement for the person going through a co-dependent problem.
- Always try to talk about “I”. This will show that the person is not being codependent about anything and will start having self-confidence.
It will Take Time
It will take time for a change. A codependent person should have a positive attitude to accept change. They have to deal with drastic emotion changes and fear. But when the person comes out of it, they will be completely changed for good. Every bad thing takes time to become good.
- There can be times the person will be frustrated and will be angry all the time, but if all of this is being taken under control, then it will be great progress for the codependent person.
- Try not to react on aggressively in codependent situations. This will make it worse and there will be no progress. Take deep breaths. Calm the person down and try to control the situation in a positive manner.
As far as all the above methods are important to keep in mind while dealing with a codependent person, it is also really important to make a background check on their past and situations so as to know whether there’s a definitive reason behind their such behavior, it would help in coping with them too.
- Sometimes the person is unaware of their behavior while they are portraying it towards you. They think their behavior is applicable and positive towards you when it’s not.
- Getting a hang of whether they’re doing it intentionally or not opens a way for you to mark your actions, and make sure not to use this as a tool to justify your actions; this can make the scenario worse.
- Try to focus on health and self-development. This will lead to having a better relationship with the family members and the people around. Try to do things that are only related to the person.
- Always try to treat the family members as if they are really mature. Try to understand each and everyone’s situation and feelings. It doesn’t mean that if one person is codependent, all the family members will be.
Try to remove the person from the codependent situation at any cost. That is the only way to improve being self-dependent and make them a self-made person.